A Completely Subjective List Of Movies I Very Much Hate

Many film lists consist of popular movies that are inspirational, creative and innovative, but this list is nothing of the sort. Below is a list of films I personally do not care for one bit… well, I care enough to make a list about it, but not enough to speak positively about any of them.

Here are 6 movies I very much dislike according to my own subjective point of view.

1. Dogville (2003)

Lars Von Trier is notorious for his disturbingly unorthodox directing style and has built an undesirable reputation on set, especially amongst his female actors.

Dogville is one of those films that perpetually screams insults at me as someone whose life is pretty much based around editing films. 

Dogville breaks all the filmmaking rules, but not for good reasons. It seems as though any decision made by Von Trier is justified by saying ‘because I’m Lars Von Trier and I can do whatever the heck I want and not because I want the story in my films to actually be good’.

This film starring Nicole Kidman may be popular among critics, but in my books, it’s an abomination. 

Not only do I hate the story and disagree with Von Trier’s nihilistic worldview, it was when I became aware of what actually went on behind the scenes that made my blood boil. 

As mentioned earlier, his reputation among women is not pleasant, one reason being he rocked up to Kidman’s hotel room naked, because apparently it was meant to influence her acting. This sort of thing isn’t unheard of on Von Trier’s film sets.

Anyway, if you’re a critic, you like to be angry at movies or are just generally a weird human being then you may like this movie, otherwise it’s probably not up your alley.

2. I Heart Huckabees (2004)

Another popular movie among critics and all my film friends (for some annoying reason), this film, starring way too many big names and directed by David O. Russel, is so pretentious I wanted to die.

The story is about existentialism, but also, it isn’t…? It makes fun of itself and tries to be funny, but at the same time, takes itself way too seriously.

The first time I began watching this movie was with my parents at the age of 16. When the very first lines of dialogue are a colourful range of explicit words, the film doesn’t stay on for very long when your parents are in charge of the remote.

Several years later, as an adult, I gave it another go and actually watched the entire movie. It didn’t get better after that first scene. It got worse. I hated every moment of it. Not only was the story unbearable, I could see the actors themselves were physically uncomfortable, which actually did affect my experience of the film.

I found out later there was a lot of tension on set between the director and his actors. It showed.

3. Holidays (2016)

An anthology film of several short horror stories based on popular holidays. Hence the genius title. They were about Christmas, Halloween, St Patrick’s Day, and many others including an Easter story with this horribly offensive looking Zombie Jesus/Easter Bunny hybrid.

The first story was bad, and so was the second one. After what felt like a lifetime of terrible shorts I kept expecting the next one to be something worth my time. Unfortunately, by the end I felt this was one of those rare moments I wish I could have taken back the last two hours of my life.

4. Suicide Squad (2016)

Whether you’re a film critic or just a ‘one trip to the cinema every once in a blue moon’ movie goer, I think we can all agree Suicide Squad was a failure. You don’t have to be a movie buff to know this film was bad.

This visually loud, overly neoned story about a bunch of mildly powerful supervillains put together to ‘maybe protect the president from superman’ was a terrible premise to begin with. It only gets more pointless when the group has to work together to stop someone (from their group) from casting a lightning bolt into the sky by doing magic belly dances.

Thankfully James Gunn will revive this piece of garbage with a reboot of almost the same name: The Suicide Squad (2020). One can only hope the ‘The’ in the title makes the new movie 1000% better than the original.

5. Copper Mountain: A Club Med Experience (1983)

The year was 1997. It was a Friday night – the beginning of the weekend – and I was at my favorite place in the world: The Video Store. As a kid, this was one of those times where it feels like all my dreams were coming true. I examined the endless array of movie choices with excitement and glee…. only to find out my mum had already decided what we’re watching that night.

It was a film that looked bad even to a child. My mother insisted it was going to be funny, because it starred Jim Carrey. However, out of my 8 year old angst I snatched the video out of her hands and discretely said ‘NO’, a word many children are familiar with.

I lost that battle and cried all the way home.

Kids have terrible taste in movies, and I was no exception, but even this one had me scratching my head wondering where the ‘funny’ was. My dad and sister had the same confusion when it ended. ‘What was that?’ we all asked. The worst part is my mum didn’t even watch it with us.

The made-for-TV movie you’ve probably never heard of is about two friends who go on a ski trip. One goes skiing while another tries to be funny and pick up women. That’s all there was to it. This film was one of Jim Carrey’s first forays into the acting world, Copper Mountain: A Club Med Experience was one of the only films I hated as a kid.

6. Silence (2016)

Silence, starring Liam Neeson, Andrew Garfield and Adam Driver, is about two young priests tasked with journeying to Japan to find their mentor who is rumoured to have committed apostasy.

This film is actually good – objectively. However, the lack of music throughout the entire story was just too much for me. A challenging experience both to watch and from a faith perspective this film was far too depressing.

I’m not one of those people who deems a film as bad because it simply didn’t make them feel good. On the contrary, many of my favourite films made me uncomfortable. A great film should make you feel something, but although Silence did just that for me, I still couldn’t justify a second viewing because of how it made me feel. 

This point is actually pretty hard to make because of how subjective it is. I would recommend this film, but don’t expect inspiration, expect to be seriously challenged with your beliefs.

There you have it. A list of films I can’t stop you from watching but can at least tell you my experience in all of them was unpleasant to varying degrees.

If you’re looking for any inspiration maybe check out another list, but if you’re weird and want to be uncomfortable then how about giving some of these titles a go.

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  • Jay Evans

    Editor

    Jay Evans has spent the last 8 years working as a film editor, 4 of which have been with The Initiative Production Company. In his spare time he enjoys music, comedy, experimental cooking and getting lost in the woods.

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